The oppressed are allowed once every few years to decide which particular representatives of the oppressing class are to represent and repress them. ~Karl Marx
Mountain View, CA--Sun Microsystems today filed a trademark infringement against the island of Java* over the use of Sun's Java* trademark.
Responding to criticism that the island has been called Java* for centuries, Sun lawyer Frank Cheatham said "Yeah, and in all that time they never filed for a trademark. They were asking for it."
Rather than pay the licensing fee, the island decided to change its name. They originally voted to change it to Visu Albasic, but an angry telegram from Redmond, Washington convinced them otherwise. The country finally settled on a symbol for a name--a neatly-colored coffee cup which still evokes the idea of java. Since most newspapers and magazines will not be able to print the name of the island, it will hereafter be referred to in print as "The Island Formerly Known As Java*".
The Island Formerly Known As Java* bills itself as a cross-landmass island, but so far has only been implemented in production on the Malay Archipelago. Africa is been rumored to have implemented it on Madagascar, but it is still in alpha testing.
Lawyers from Sun are also, reportedly, attempting to locate the operators of the huge fiery ball at the center of the solar system for a similar action.
*Java is a Trademark of Sun Microsystems, Inc. Anyone caught using the
trademark without permission will be beaten, flogged, sued, and forced
to use Microsoft products.
Believed to be from CYBERIA-L Digest 6/96
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